7 REASONS WHY MOST RELATIONSHIPS DON'T LAST, AND EVEN MARRIAGES. BY DR. I. D. SAMUEL

 

7 REASONS WHY MOAT RELATIONSHIPS DON'T LAST, AND EVEN MARRIAGES. BY DR. I. D. SAMUEL 

let me expand each reason with some detail and real-life-like examples so it’s clearer why most relationships don’t last:

1. Poor Communication

Explanation: Healthy relationships thrive on openness and honesty. When partners fail to express feelings, listen actively, or clarify misunderstandings, small issues grow into major problems. Silence, assumptions, or harsh words create distance.

Example: A woman feels neglected because her partner works long hours, but instead of telling him, she grows resentful. He assumes she understands he’s working for their future. Over time, they both feel unappreciated and emotionally disconnected.

2. Lack of Trust

Explanation: Trust is the backbone of intimacy. Without it, insecurity and suspicion dominate the relationship. Once broken (through lies, cheating, or repeated disappointments), it’s very difficult to rebuild.

Example: A man catches his partner texting someone secretly late at night. Even though she insists it was harmless, doubt sets in. From then on, every time her phone buzzes, he wonders who it is. The suspicion eventually destroys the peace of the relationship.

3. Unrealistic Expectations

Explanation: Many people enter relationships expecting their partner to “fix” their loneliness, always make them happy, or never change. But no one can meet every emotional or personal need. Disappointment sets in when reality doesn’t match the fantasy.

Example: A woman believes marriage will end her feelings of emptiness. After a few months, she realizes her partner cannot fulfill her every emotional gap, and she grows bitter, thinking the relationship has failed — when the real issue is unmet unrealistic expectations.

4. Neglect of Effort

Explanation: Relationships are like gardens — they die if neglected. Consistent love, attention, and quality time are needed. When partners stop dating each other, stop complimenting, or stop showing interest, the bond weakens.

Example: At first, a man surprises his partner with kind gestures, late-night talks, and dates. After some months, he stops trying, thinking “she already knows I love her.” She begins to feel invisible and unloved, leading to emotional withdrawal.

5. Different Values or Life Goals

Explanation: Love alone isn’t always enough. If two people have opposite priorities, faith practices, or visions for the future, clashes will arise. Without compromise, differences become walls.

Example: One partner dreams of moving abroad for career growth, while the other insists on staying close to family. Neither is wrong, but the conflicting life goals create a deadlock that love alone cannot fix.

6. Poor Conflict Resolution

Explanation: Disagreements are normal, but how couples handle them determines survival. Constant yelling, blame, or avoidance leads to resentment. Healthy couples fight fairly and resolve issues; unhealthy ones let problems pile up.

Example: Instead of calmly discussing finances, a couple argues every time money is mentioned. They attack each other’s character (“You’re irresponsible!”) instead of solving the problem. Over time, both avoid the topic altogether, and financial stress ruins the bond.

7. Emotional Immaturity

Explanation: Immature partners may be selfish, easily offended, or unable to regulate their emotions. They often prioritize winning arguments over understanding, or pleasure over commitment.

Example: A boyfriend storms out every time his girlfriend raises a concern. Instead of listening, he sulks or blames her. She eventually feels like she’s dating a child rather than an equal partner and leaves.

✨ In short: Most relationships fail not because love wasn’t present at the beginning, but because love wasn’t maintained with trust, communication, effort, and maturity.